Conversation With God

I watched an enlightening movie the other day called "Conversations with God". It is a spiritual movie and to be honest humbling and enlightening. I watched it Saturday night. It is based on a true story. At parts it was hard to hold back my own tears....The man who it is about is a successful author now but was homeless for a time. After the movie Ben and I just conversed as we do many nights ,but this night it was about the movie. It was very moving. It reminded me of my life in a way...It is that conversation we all have with God where it is our voice talking but it is gods wisdom. Many people just don't really listen to the voice me included sometimes. The humbling part was how at one point he was looking in the dumpster for food and cans for money and he found a half eaten sandwich and sat beside the dumpster to eat it...He looked up and a few feet away a very young girl was with her mother looking at him and the mother gave the man a look as if to say you disgust me. The man started crying in humiliation and he was just at the lowest point. My heart hurt so bad at this part. I live in an area where there are homeless people and it isn't unusual to see them. Every chance I have or if i am asked for money I have no problem giving it to them. I know I know most people say well all they will do is go buy drugs or alcohol or they say some of them make more money than me...Whatever the case my stance is and always will be not to judge where they are at or what they will do with the money it is to give as though they were my brother. I won't lie sometimes I get tired of seeing it but I always go back to the fact that it isn't my place to judge and if I have a few bucks it is theirs. God has blessed me with so much and they actually do me good by letting me give. I have heard people say there is no reason for people to be homeless in this country and I know there is alot out there to help them but there are also a lot of reasons our system has failed them. Mental health is one. I am blessed that I have the means to take care of my many mental issues I have faced over the years depression and anxiety. I couldn't imagine the life I would be leading had I been born of lesser means. I guess I see myself in there faces. I remember my mom was one of those mothers who would say don't look the homeless person in the eye and drive right by. Then go to church and drop a donation in the donation box. I am sorry looking back that just seems wrong. If people call themselves Christians; it stated in the bible what you did not do for those lesser than you you did not do for me "Jesus". Something like that. How can people! I will always remember a homeless lady coming over to me when I was pumping my gas a few days after Christmas....Whats funny is I saw her on the other end of the highway and thought to myself I feel so bad for her and wish I could do something to make her life a little better. Well once approached she asked if she could have some cash she was trying to get to downtown and needed some money to put gas in her car....I knew it was a lie casuse I didn't see her car. Anyways I had been given should I say blessed with more cash than I needed for Christmas and so I pulled what I had in my wallet and happily gave it to her. She then started to cry and I just instincutaly huged her as though she were a family member. She walked away and I got back in my comfy car and comfy lifestyle feeling a since of peace. She gave me more that day than anything else could have. She let me feel needed and it was better cause it was a complete stranger. That good feeling is still with me and thinking about it makes me feel warm. That is what everyone is is family. Especially those less fortunate. I don't care if she took all the money and bought beer or drugs whatever she needs to comfort her weary soul. By no means am I perfect and I know not everyone agrees with me on this topic but how I view it just feels right in my soul for me.